Genesius Times
BREAKING: The ‘Free Palpatine’ movement spreads across the US
In a bizarre and slightly humorous twist, a peculiar movement known as the “Free Palpatine” campaign ...View More
BREAKING: Sources confirm Stacey Abrams ate Uncle Bosey
ATLANTA—In a shocking turn of events, sources close to the Biden campaign have confirmed that Stacey ...View More
California Tourism launches ‘Come to Kill Your Baby, Stay For The Weather’ campaign
SACRAMENTO—California Tourism officials have unveiled a bold and controversial new marketing campaig ...View More
BREAKING: US border states change name to Taiwan, Ukraine, and Israel to get money from Congress to defend their borders
US—In a bold and bewildering move, four U.S. border states—Arizona, New Mexico, Texas, and Californi ...View More
EARTH DAY: Biden says it’s environmentally responsible to kill your girlfriend and compost her remains remains
WASHINGTON, DC—In a bizarre and unsettling Earth Day address, President Joe Biden urged Americans to ...View More
BREAKING: Congress bans waving American flag in Capitol; allows only Ukrainian flag to be flown
WASHINGTON, DC—Congress has unanimously passed a bill making it a federal offense to wave the Americ ...View More
BREAKING: All Congresspeople who voted for Ukraine funding have been drafted to fight in the war
Washington, DC—In a shocking turn of events, all Congresspeople who voted in favor of Ukraine fundin ...View More
Chick-Fil-A Introduces “Uncle Bosie’s Bites” & “Corn Pop Poppers”
ATLANTA—Chick-Fil-A has introduced two new menu items that are sure to raise eyebrows: “Uncle Bosie’ ...View More
2024 Burning Man Festival moves to outside NYC courthouse during Trump hush money trial
NEW YORK—Organizers of Burning Man 2024 have announced that this year’s festival will take place on ...View More
This Day in ‘Fiery but Mostly Peaceful’ History: Feds Massacre 76 in Waco Siege
The Waco siege, also known as the Waco massacre, was the fiery but mostly peaceful law enforcement s ...View More
