Commentary/Satire by Bill the Butcher

Once upon a rainbow there were two horses standing out in a field of clover grazing, listening to the birds chirping, and enjoying a relaxed morning after a protracted career at the tracks. By and by one says to the other, “I say, old man! You’re new here. Tell me about yourself.” I know, I know, rainbows and talking horses. Look, it’s just a story! Work with me on this!

Well, the second horse said, “I found myself at the Belmont Stakes. I placed and eventually got all the way to the Kentucky Derby. By that time, I’d gained enough experience that I ended up a nose in the lead. The horse behind me was holding but losing breath. I was maintaining the lead and looking at a win. Right then, when I could actually see the flag, my hoof rolled and though I didn’t fall it cost me momentum and I came in show!”

The first horse said, “That’s tragic! I, myself was running at Preakness. I had excelled in several competitions and was confident of a sure win. Maybe even leading to a Triple Crown. My owner didn’t share this enthusiasm and began me on a series of injections designed to increase my stamina. And I won! However, upon a simple test of my blood the medication was discovered, and my victory was taken from me! in fact that’s why I’m here. Sentenced to eat clover and wait for the glue factory!”

Now it so happens that there was a dog lounging on the ground within earshot of the two horses, taking this all in. By and by he spoke. “You horses! One excuse after another as to why you lost. You lost because you are losers. A loser always has a reason. The reason is simple. Not good enough! Now, I’m a winner! I ran in the dog races down in Memphis. I won every race. I outran all them bitches, I even outran that little wooden rabbit and pissed on the judge’s foot as he gave my owner the prize. Because I’m a winner!”

The horses were amazed. After a moment of silence, one looked at the other and said, “Well what do you know? A talking dog!”

The world is filled with talking dogs. From your unemployed “know it all” brother-in-law to Chamillea Harris, double talking experts who know a lot about nothing. The “Z” generation bets their asses, hats, and all their cattle on these people. Google is the new Encyclopedia Britannica. From magic mushrooms to flat earths, Google is the go-to source for the Imams of The Woke Movement. The internet is awash with any number of hair brained theories that floats their boats. Damn the icebergs and full speed ahead!

As we wait for Armageddon all common sense has fallen by the wayside. Any political or medical “facts” are accepted by the great unwashed without question. Where do you think the 55,000 genders came from? Sometimes a penis is just a penis. Girls’ restrooms filled up with Hells Angels. Wait! I misspoke. I have met some of those guys. It might be better if they were there. Then the little girls could at least take a piss in safety. Now, where was I?

The influx of disinformation is so loud that real, substantiated facts can no longer be heard. Just trying to tell a Wokester that an unborn baby might be a form of life and it becomes impossible because they’re searching for “life” on the sun! And when a man tries to say we need to take care of ourselves first they blow his ear off. And everything is racist. People over sixty are all racist. Frogs are racist, and gay. Oh, and that’s another thing. All Homosapiens are now homoSEXUALS! All the ancient Greeks were gay. Roman’s too. All priests are gay. Wait! I might have to rethink that one. But you get my point. Is a Crocodile Dundee panties check needed for a simple heterosexual encounter?

There is a small, quiet contingent silently sitting out there somewhere beginning to say, “We have to make this look like an accident.” The simple fact is this cannot last. Back to the basics. Gimme dat ole time religion. The Ten Commandments are simple enough. The universe is not the result of a tornado in a trailer park! The guy up in the big house made it and He’s still out there. Ignoring Him will not make him go away. And there are simple rules. Don’t lie, don’t steal, don’t screw your sister and try to avoid killing your mother and father. And the farther we delve into so-called “science” the more we find the “Big Guy’s” fingerprints. From atoms to galaxies. Code 6.14 is everywhere from a pretty face to the “Cinderella Zone” of inhabitable planets. Doctors discover new facts every day that was right under their noses, yet med students are researching the benefits of marijuana. Law students at The University of Texas think the President can erase The Bill of Rights. Google it!

The earth is 4.543 billion years old according to geological studies or around 6,000 years old, as calculated by using the genealogical records within the Bible which assumes that each generation spanned a relatively consistent timeframe.

Do you think we’re the first? Or the last? The dinosaurs did. Comets anyone? America? Try the Roman Empire. The Greeks. Babylon. Hell! The freaking ZULUS! Everybody wants to get next to a happening guy. And the happening guy dies, returns to the stardust from whence he came, and leaves his ideas carved in stone.

Beam me up Elon

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