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This article was originally published on Madhouse Magazine. You can read the original article HERE
Led Zeppelin singer, Robert Plant, was spotted buying food and snacks at a “Piggly Wiggly” supermarket in Tuscaloosa, Alabama.
Led Zeppelin fans were shocked to learn that their hero, Robert Plant, “The Golden God”, would actually consume food like a mere mortal. Super fan Rich Pacesa commented, “I thought Plant was like a cyborg or something. I always felt Robert was kept in storage until they pulled him out for concert tours. I can’t believe he eats food just like me. That is crazy.”
Robert Plant Eats Food
Plant was spotted at the Piggly Wiggly buying Spam, Slim Jims, “Pop Rocks”, Diet Mountain Dew soda, a Roast Chicken, “Beef-a-Roni”, a jar of “Cheez Whiz”, Sleepy Time Tea and a case of Miller High Life Beer. He also purchased a stack of scratch off lottery tickets and athletes foot powder.
When asked what he planned on doing with the food, Plant snapped, “What do you think I am going to do with the food mate, stick it up my arse? I am going to eat it of course!”
Sign My Banana
John Blacketer, a fan for over 50 years squealed with delight “Oh my god, Robert is so far superior to me, I cannot believe we are even the same species. I am such a nobody and he is so awesome, I just love him. I wonder if he would sign my banana?”
Plant, did in fact confirm to Madhouse News that he does eat food. He also confirmed that he buys said food himself from grocery stores. When questioned further Robert stated that he also uses the bathroom. “I move my bowels, I go number 1 and number 2. I am human and I perform all human functions. What is wrong with you people?”
Read Other Robert Plant Stories Here: Robert Plant Stripped to Underpants by Rabid Fans
Robert Plant Forced to Expose Himself to Prove He Was Not Shoplifting
This article was originally published by Madhouse Magazine. We only curate news from sources that align with the core values of our intended conservative audience. If you like the news you read here we encourage you to utilize the original sources for even more great news and opinions you can trust!
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