Kansas City Chiefs kicker Harrison Butker is being dragged for stating during a 2023 commencement address that one of the most important titles a woman can have is “homemaker.” But as a young, college-educated woman myself, I wish someone had told me those things years ago.

I graduated from Fordham University in 2020 with a bachelor’s degree in International Political Economy — an arduous four-year process that surely would be worth it in the end, I assured myself. But as it turns out, the fruits of my labor — going on national television, meeting high-ranking elected officials, and breaking important news — while fulfilling to a degree, simply do not satiate my growing appetite for the one thing I can’t do independently: have a family.

Throughout my college years, female students were encouraged to develop a sense of hyper-independence. Get your degree. Enter the workforce. Rise to the top. You don’t need a man!

I would often hear from my lefty female professors that men are misogynists, women belong in the workforce just as much as any man, and having a family means battling a husband for an equal partnership in which you, the wife, can still have a full-time career in exchange for another woman raising the kids.

To be frank, the mentality imposed on my peers and me was to “be a boss b-tch.” We could have it all, we were told. And if we couldn’t find a man content with having a full-time working wife, then we simply didn’t need a man. Apparently, women could live their lives alone and thrive on spending nine-plus hours in an office daily before going home to their multiple cats and cheap reality television shows.

But we were duped by unhappy women and crunchy, emasculated men.

While I didn’t totally drink the Kool-Aid, I did begin to believe it was important — and necessary — to be well-established in my career before I could do anything else.

I faltered when I prioritized my career over everything else, including developing relationships that could lead to marriage and a family. I’ve become increasingly aware — and frankly upset — that I neglected to cultivate other avenues in my life in exchange for the ability to say, “I’m a working woman.”

Some might call me a misogynist, but this is no anti-woman screed. Being a woman is awesome. But women don’t have to be just like men to find value and fulfillment. We have unique natural qualities, skills, instincts, and more — not to mention the incredible ability to cultivate the next generation with our own bodies. Talk about being a boss — we can do things men can only dream of!

Don’t misunderstand. I love the field I’m in, and I’m blessed and grateful beyond belief for all the opportunities my hard work has afforded me — including working at The Federalist, where women are celebrated and accepted for, well, being women! For many of my colleagues, and hopefully me someday, that means being wives and caring mothers while also being able to pursue our shared passion for the truth and this great country.

Butker’s remarks were not meant to discourage women from pursuing their passions but rather to remind them that women are innately special beings. We serve a purpose men cannot. We can bring life into the world and foster a loving environment like no other. We shouldn’t sacrifice our purpose in exchange for fleeting validation from a career.

Take it from someone who did that.

Brianna Lyman is an elections correspondent at The Federalist.