This article was originally published on Liberty Beacon - Satire. You can read the original article HERE
Commentary by Bill the Butcher
Dogs will devour Jezebel by the wall of Jezreel
Before I start, I would like to say that I am in no way suggesting that someone should sic the dogs on Kamala Harris. Well, not formally anyway. I’m looking at broader points. As my readers already know, I’m a hopeless misogynist. I come from Texas where men are men, women are women, and the sheep are nervous. Until I started taking certain medications I drank whiskey by the gallon, and I hate Rap Music. That all having been said, I’m just like most of you.
I make predictions. What I do is make a Ben Franklin list, mix in a little experience with a dash of common sense and try to produce a prediction. When Biden quit and Harris became the President Designate, I was asked if I thought she would win the election. It was about that time that Kamala switched skins going from Apache to Aborigine, so I conceded that, accepting her metamorphosis and said that I couldn’t see a black woman being elected to the highest office in the land (If you don’t count Elon Musk’s office).
I wasn’t wrong, but I wasn’t totally right, either. I was drawing from old school conventional wisdom. Obama won because his grandparents were white, so he got “grandfathered” in. Jesse Jackson got laughed out of the primaries and Hillary actually won the popular vote, but Simon didn’t say and that was the end of that! So, naturally I chose the wisdom of the ancients in compiling my answer.
Well, I was a dumb ass and apparently Trump is too because if he is following my Baby Boomer line of reasoning, he is well on the way to a concession speech, that he will have to give if he doesn’t wise up quick! Presently Trump is reliving the past. He is a bit delusional too. He thinks his tried-and-true sound bites will suffice when he has a face off with Harris, but Kamala will rip his face off and hand it back to him.
Ring the bell, school’s in. I am a Trump supporter. I want him back in office to finish what he started. He won’t change history, but a little janitorial service is needed. America is designed to fix problems that arise as the country moves from era to era. The change from a agricultural economy to a metroplex way of mind needed a bit more than a Will Rogers approach. A little civics lesson. Trump has been compared to Hitler. So called “experts” taking events in Germany from the loss of World War 1 to the rise of the Nazi party and eventually the collapse of Germany that was much worse than the first time. Germany, like Europe is old school. Still is! They won’t admit it but look at them! The New World was just that. New! People fed up with the “same ole same ole” and came to a place far enough away that they could make a clean start. Of the People. Europe didn’t have that! Look at the leaders. First of all they are members of the “Royal” family. Inbred! So scared that one strand of “people” DNA might slip in they married cousins and . . . well, we’ll just leave that right there. They took pride in being related and a “pure” blood line to the point that the Csar apparent, Alexia suffered from hemophilia as did scores of the family who received this from Queen Victoria of England. And Alexis’s mother was a German. German, Russian, England. If that’s not Hillbilly I’m not a white boy from Austin! The Habsburgs of Spain were eat up with something called the Habsburg Jaw. And this bunch of hillbillies had been running things since Caesar ate his last pizza. It became enticing to go across the North Sea and start fresh. The people who did that were different than the ones who stayed behind! Even the slaves, when freed, didn’t run back to Africa. And all of us were immigrants. If you didn’t have a feather in your hair, you weren’t FROM here. Kamala used to have a feather in her hair. Switched it for an extension. Anyway, where was I?
All the nations that formed in the Americas had the same idea. To hell with the old country. If you will note, there are no kings and queens in the new world. It’s all “Of the People” even when it’s bad people it’s still people! No one is ordained to Lord over anyone. The United States is the best of the lot. The only country even close is Canada and they huddle down near the southern border. You know, come to think of it, if the majority of the people in America lived in the South can you imagine how nice it would be? Something to consider.
The power in the United States government is spit into what is supposed to be three equal branches. Legislative, Executive, and Judicial. In my opinion the Judicial is a bit more equal than the other two, but I only think that when they make a decision that I don’t like. The Congress dreams things up, or tears things down. The House comes up with a bill, sends it across the hall to the Senate, and if they like it, they send it to the president to sign and Thanksgiving is declared for another year. If the turkey is too small, it goes to the judiciary, and they weigh the subject. If he is imperfect, he’s on the table in the morning. Is the system perfect? No! Are mistakes made? Yes! A lot of good turkeys have seen the axe, but don’t axe me about that. This system is too large and intricate for any one man to run. So, if that is true it only makes sense that there can be no royal family running America since the time of George Washington. Was John Jr. designated as King JFK the Second? Nope! The Roosevelts thought that, the Kennedys, the Clintons and I’ll give you a dollar to a donut that’s crossed the dinner table at the Mar-a-Lago Club. They ALL consider it. If you think they don’t then I have a bridge for you and . . . well, you know the rest.
Europeans expect the great man in power will perpetuate that power. They enable it. Third Reich? What happened to Reiches one and two? Well, they didn’t work any better than any other ideas about government that came out of Europe from people with deformed jaws and leaky veins. Strong man? They form a dynasty that will die nasty in a couple hundred years or so. Quicker if you jump on the Jews. And then what do they do after that? Find another strong man to be in power to replace the last man in power. Did you notice how they most always kill the family too? There is a method in their madness. Strong manism tends to run in families. Over here we just put them on the talk show circuit. All praise Al Gore! The American system of government is so intricate that no one man can control all of it all the time. And while women can inspire, they are not certified members of the Snobbish Men’s Club. X and Y don’t play that. Is that misogynistic enough for you? Well, hang onto your seat. It gets worse.
Ask yourself, what will happen should Kamala Harris win the White House? The same thing that happened when Jimmy Carter did. The only difference is back then there were peanut jokes and if she wins, we’ll just have coconut jokes. Same old Congress, same old Senate, and same old Constitution. Sorry ladies. No Queen Kamala the First. But what if Trump wins? Let’s examine that. Donald Trump is a New York Real Estate Broker. I was in Real Estate for a time. Real Estate Brokers are a peculiar lot. They don’t use algebra. They use business math. 1+ 1 = 2, not whatever makes you feel good. Capitalism all the way. Full speed ahead and damn the Securities and Exchange Commission! Lead, follow, or get out of the way. That’s Donald Trump! A lot of people can’t deal with that. They want miracles. They want a strong man. Their man quit so they picked a strong woman. Kamala Harris is gonna part the Red Tape and the Children of Hope are gonna enter the Promised Land of polka dots and pink shoelaces. A Big Mac in every hand. Every man a queen and Vice Versa! Wouldn’t it be loverly? Well, it ain’t gonna happen, sit your asses down!
America is a Capitalist Christian Nation! Do we forbid other ideas, lifestyles, or innovation. Certainly not. There is Mexican food, American food, and then there’s TexMex! Italians on Mulberry Street celebrating Columbus Day no matter what the historians say. Waving American flags and eating mama’s homemade lasagna. And no Woke will ever put that to sleep. That little girl in her white confirmation dress waiting for her communion is gonna eat that cracker and Richard Dawkins can bitch about Jesus until he’s blue in his coffin! America is the only country people are trying to break INTO!
Does Donald Trump lie? Well, yeah. Everyone does. Either by mistake or design, we all misspeak. Look at his detractors. People who claim that it’s scientifically possible that a man can be a woman. In theory you can drive a nail through glass, too. Try it sometime! Some things just won’t work. Trump wants a wall. Being a Texan, I can tell you that if he succeeds, he will be snake amazed when the first fourteen-year-old Mexican girl hops over the top like she’s got good sense. And why do you think she’d do that? Because sleeping on a floor at the YMCA in Harker Heights Texas is far and beyond anything she’s ever seen. That’s why! That’s why the pilgrims left that rock at Plymouth, and that’s why I support Donald Trump over some fly by night former girlfriend of Willie Brown! She’s not qualified. She is being managed. And if elected it will not be the “end of the country.” Just one more lesson for the great experiment. The greatest democracy the world has ever seen.
His message? You have to love America. We all have to support her. Even if Harris wins. We must hang together for if we don’t the world will surely hang us separately. They want what we have because they can’t create what we have. Frankly, we couldn’t do it again so we have to preserve what we have. We will never have it again. We came over on different boats, but we’re in the same boat now!
Y’all can throw Jezebel in the garbage truck now. I’ll call animal control.
••••
••••
The Liberty Beacon Project is now expanding at a near exponential rate, and for this we are grateful and excited! But we must also be practical. For 7 years we have not asked for any donations, and have built this project with our own funds as we grew. We are now experiencing ever increasing growing pains due to the large number of websites and projects we represent. So we have just installed donation buttons on our websites and ask that you consider this when you visit them. Nothing is too small. We thank you for all your support and your considerations … (TLB)
••••
Comment Policy: As a privately owned web site, we reserve the right to remove comments that contain spam, advertising, vulgarity, threats of violence, racism, or personal/abusive attacks on other users. This also applies to trolling, the use of more than one alias, or just intentional mischief. Enforcement of this policy is at the discretion of this websites administrators. Repeat offenders may be blocked or permanently banned without prior warning.
••••
Disclaimer: TLB websites contain copyrighted material the use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. We are making such material available to our readers under the provisions of “fair use” in an effort to advance a better understanding of political, health, economic and social issues. The material on this site is distributed without profit to those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving it for research and educational purposes. If you wish to use copyrighted material for purposes other than “fair use” you must request permission from the copyright owner.
••••
Disclaimer: The information and opinions shared are for informational purposes only including, but not limited to, text, graphics, images and other material are not intended as medical advice or instruction. Nothing mentioned is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.
This article was originally published by Liberty Beacon - Satire. We only curate news from sources that align with the core values of our intended conservative audience. If you like the news you read here we encourage you to utilize the original sources for even more great news and opinions you can trust!
Comments