Metallica frontman James Hetfield and his wife of 25 years, Francesca, confirmed that they are indeed getting divorced. Now it is confirmed that James is dating Kim Kardashian. Kardashian is recently divorced and also just broke up with her boyfriend Pete Davidson.

The pair was spotted canoodling at the Four Seasons in Vail, Colorado. They were seen hiking, biking, golfing, fly fishing and getting cozy in the hot springs. During dinner, the Paparazzi caught the pair eating spaghetti and meatballs like Lady and the Tramp. “It was quite disgusting” said Lisa Adams. “I was trying to eat my dinner and I had to watch those two slurping and slobbering on each other. Basically they were like animals. There were children in the restaurant. I asked to see the manager and expressed my displeasure. That disgusting display put me right off my beet salad.”

James Hetfield Hearts Kim Kardashian

Kim told Madhouse News that James checks all her boxes. “For one thing He is unstable with a history of addiction problems. Plus he has a neck tattoo. All things considered, he is the perfect man in my book. Obviously I should write a book, I am really good at picking men.” Kim is thrice divorced and has left a trail of broken men in her wake. 

Hetfield added, “Kim is my soul mate and she saved me. As Sir-Mix-A-Lot once said, I like big butts and I cannot lie. Being with Kim is like making love to a waterbed. I have to tie a broomstick to my back so I don’t get pulled in. The vortex is really strong once she gets going.“

At this point Hetfield confirmed that he and Kim are working on new music together for the next Metallica album. “She has a lot of good ideas and she has an amazing voice” giggled Hetfield. “We already recorded a duet together of that song by James Taylor and Carly Simon. You know, mock yeah, ing yeah, mocking bird. It’s going to be epic. I can’t wait to tell Lars the good news, He is going to love Kim like I do.” 

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