NEW MARKET, MN — Sources close to Cliff Johnson say that the father of seven was in for a horrid surprise last weekend when a tiny, pipsqueaked little punk in the backseat asked him, "Dad, isn't speeding a sin?"

According to reports, Johnson was cruising along comfortably at 72 in a 55-mph zone when a maliciously cute little lisp from just over his shoulder piped in with an unwelcome question, causing him to immediately slow down to a snail-paced 64 miles an hour.

"What? Uh…say that again, sweetheart?" Johnson asked. "Speeding? Well, it's kind of a gray area, you know? Like…um, well….you see, that's a great question! Good job! Why don't we ask Mom when we get home?"

"But Daddy, isn't that the law? And isn't breaking the law a sin? I thought we weren't supposed to sin," persisted the little brat.

At publishing time, the snot-nosed little jerk had asked him if God thinks it's OK for us to blow through a stoplight a full three seconds after it turned red.

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