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After his decisive victory in this week’s election, Donald Trump is preparing to take office in a few months to begin his term as the 47th President of the United States. What can Americans expect from in during his first 100 days in office? Here are 10 things!
Get JD Vance Far, Far Away From Him
Donald is already thinking of lots of projects for JD that involve him being far away. Border stuff, UN stuff, you name it. JD is gonna log some serious miles.
Only Travel by Cyber Truck
Elon swear this thing’s not going to break down, so Trump’s going to give it a shot and see how it goes.
Put A McDonald’s in the White House
Trump got this idea from a recent rewatch of one of his favorite movies, Richie Rich.
Shoot a Missile at the Next Hurricane
“We just want to see what happens, folks,” said Trump about the controversial idea. “I’m playing a hunch on this one.”
Put Kid Rock Poster Up In Oval Office
Mike Pence fought against this tooth and nail last time. Well, here we are.
Let Barron Do Whatever He Wants
He’s older this time around, and frankly, huge. No one is allowed to tell Barron no to anything, and he exploits that to the fullest.
Ignore Gavin Newsome’s Phone Calls
Eventually he’ll have to take them, but this will be funny for a while, most Americans have agreed.
Drain the Swamp
This time around it literally just means the swamp the last administration left in the White House lawn. What the hell, guys?
Deport Whoopi Goldberg
There’s no solid reason for this, but everyone agrees it will be funny, just like the Newsome thing.
Legalize Marijuana, Everything Else
Screw it,” Trump said. “I don’t touch the stuff, but go nuts everybody.”
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