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After waiting more than three and a half years, Fox News finally secured a rare, coveted interview with Vice President Kamala Harris. Brett Baier, chosen to conduct what was expected to be a no-nonsense grilling, found himself overwhelmed as Harris pirouetted through policy questions with vague platitudes and nervous laughter.
As the 15-minute interview drew to a close, Baier appeared visibly emotional, overcome by what he described as a “once-in-a-lifetime” display of statesmanship. “Wow,” Baier murmured, dabbing his eyes with a handkerchief. “Harris just won Arizona.”
A stunned newsroom watched in silence as Baier continued to bask in the moment. “That was the most presidential thing I’ve ever seen,” he gushed, hands trembling. “She dodged every policy question like Muhammad Ali in his prime. If the electoral map had feelings, Arizona just flipped.”
Fox executives were reportedly caught off-guard by Baier’s emotional response. “We were hoping for a tough interview,” said one producer, “but Brett saw a flicker of something… presidential-ish, I guess?”
As news of Baier’s declaration spread, Arizona officials scrambled to issue statements clarifying that the state’s election would not, in fact, be awarded based on a single Fox News interview—at least not officially.
Meanwhile, Harris’s team celebrated the unexpected triumph. “This is exactly what we’ve been aiming for,” said campaign manager Kal Laughlin. “Avoid direct answers, throw in a nervous chuckle or two, and bam—Arizona is ours!”
Social media was soon flooded with memes, with #PresidentKamala trending. One viral post joked, “Harris 2024: Winning elections one Brett Baier tear at a time.”
Fox News viewers, however, were less amused. “What the hell, Brett?” wrote one outraged fan on Twitter. “Did we just give her Arizona or what?”
When reached for comment, Harris responded with a grin and a cryptic, “We are where we are, and it is what it is.” She then laughed for ten straight seconds.
Arizona’s governor called for calm amid the frenzy. “I assure you,” he said, “Arizona will hold its election as scheduled. But, uh… we are looking into this just in case.”
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