Diddy was jailed after the FBI found 1000 bottles of baby oil on his property. Diddy’s Lawyer accused Costco of providing baby oil in bulk to Diddy. Costco says they don’t even sell baby oil let alone in bulk.

Drugstores and big box stores are scrambling to secure their baby oil. Baby oil will now be kept behind the counter of the pharmacy. Tracking has been installed to verify that new baby oil limits will be followed. They will sell no more than one bottle of baby oil per household per month. Proof that the person has a baby or a relative with a baby is also being implemented. There may be exceptions for licensed daycare facilities. They will be licensed for a specific number of bottles based on the age and number of children cared for.

Kamala Harris spoke about stopping the influx of baby oil over the border. Border agents have said this is too little too late. Baby oil sniffing dogs are being trained to be at border crossings as an additional way to catch smugglers. Women with babies are being recruited to carry baby oil over the border. There will be severe penalties put in force.

We at DogFaceponia believe this is an overreaction to the baby oil situation but that is what the government is for. We thought Diddy was accused of trafficking in more sordid things than baby oil. For now, we recommend using DFP Oil instead.